Rules online dating ebook
"That is not repressive: that is called self-control and smart, effective behaviour.""We are feminists," adds Fein. We say go ahead and run a marathon and buy a condo and start a new business, just don't chase guys.It's not good or bad, it just doesn't work."Such is the crisis that constant contact has caused in our consciousness that Fein and Schneider have also created a chart in the new book that will tell you how long to wait before you text a man back (hint: the lag period increases, the older and supposedly wiser you are, and leave at least four hours before replying to man's initial text, whatever your age)."Don't text him back immediately… Never double text," they suggest."If you want more from a guy, give less."It's good advice, written in the vein of now-famous post-Rules guides Why Men Love Bitches and He's Just Not That Into You; each is predicated on creating an epiphany moment in women, when they suddenly understand what it is that men want or need from them.Fein and Schneider also suggest various techniques for leaving an online chat or email chain as quickly as possible, to retain your mystique.(One of these is "my internet is acting funny", which one male acquaintance suggested was about as seductive as Google chatting with his mum).If you're horrified at the suggestion, clearly you're part of the generation this latest book is aimed at.For the rest of us, it's a welcome return to anonymity, to relinquishing the constant anxiety over whether you should be publicising how cool you are by tweeting your global positioning reference every time you enter a cool new bar or restaurant.
And it's an important subject to address, given the de-mystification of internet dating and the rise of outlandish digital phenomena such as "sexting".
Plenty of us have been waiting to find that out for years.
The New Rules might not explain the great mystery, but they offer certain coping strategies in the meantime.
The Rules: Time-tested secrets for capturing the heart of Mr.
Right appeared in 1995 and advocated doing pretty much what your mother told you: play hard to get; keep a bit in reserve; remain mysterious.
Fein and Schneider have even enlisted the help of their teenage daughters, to add their own take on romance in an over-connected era."These days, it doesn't matter whether a guy calls, texts or emails to ask you out," goes one of their hymeneal homilies, "as long as he asks you right." "Technology is great," continues Schneider. But it's the overuse of technology that is the problem. They're addicted to answering guys back in nanoseconds and they're not getting dates.